The Dapper Dictator

Feb 23

Today, we look at the Basartorialist Al-Assad’s runway looks. Syriously! He is one hez’bawler! Asma (see above, meow!) obviously knows how to dress her man. He may have his fingers in Lebanon, and be trading in arms - but at least the cuffs are perfectly tailored. He’s mad anti-Israel and only recently got on Facebook but whatever this Ba’athist president wears is Allawite with me.  

Today, we look at the Basartorialist Al-Assad’s runway looks. Syriously! He is one hez’bawler! Asma (see above, meow!) obviously knows how to dress her man. He may have his fingers in Lebanon, and be trading in arms - but at least the cuffs are perfectly tailored. He’s mad anti-Israel and only recently got on Facebook but whatever this Ba’athist president wears is Allawite with me.  

Feb 21

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Feb 16

It’s Dapper Dictator Promotion Day in North Korea! Congratulations to everyone’s favorite roly-poly, lil’ dumplin’ hair-presumptive-future-supreme-leader: Kim Jong Un! It’s obvious that he stands out from the crowd, especially a crowd of several thousand identical clone-like citizens. His country may be suffering a food shortage, delusional paranoia, and nuclear ambitions — but he is making his state issued uniform all his own by sporting an understated lapel pin, a super trendy Nixon Watch and saying to hell with unattainable body image! Although in DPKR, it may just be.

It’s Dapper Dictator Promotion Day in North Korea! Congratulations to everyone’s favorite roly-poly, lil’ dumplin’ hair-presumptive-future-supreme-leader: Kim Jong Un! It’s obvious that he stands out from the crowd, especially a crowd of several thousand identical clone-like citizens. His country may be suffering a food shortage, delusional paranoia, and nuclear ambitions — but he is making his state issued uniform all his own by sporting an understated lapel pin, a super trendy Nixon Watch and saying to hell with unattainable body image! Although in DPKR, it may just be.

“Nice suit. John Phillips, London. I have two myself. Rumor has it Arafat buys his there.” — Hans Gruber, Die Hard

[video]

Feb 15

Even though he was democratically elected, like three times - Silvio Berlusconi’s 20 + year history of mafia connections, self-serving legislative changes, and 90% control of Italy’s media qualifies him for today’s Dapper Dictator. Today it was announced that he’ll face trial for paying an underage dancer Ruby Heart-Stealer for additional services and then pulling strings to release her from jail because he thought she was the niece of frequent fashion-plate, Hosni Mubarak. Silvo also takes a risk with this look from back in 2002 - a Pirates of the Mediterranean meets the Real Slim Shady - and I appreciate l’uomo alla moda with a blatant disregard for rules. Che bello! 

Even though he was democratically elected, like three times - Silvio Berlusconi’s 20 + year history of mafia connections, self-serving legislative changes, and 90% control of Italy’s media qualifies him for today’s Dapper Dictator. Today it was announced that he’ll face trial for paying an underage dancer Ruby Heart-Stealer for additional services and then pulling strings to release her from jail because he thought she was the niece of frequent fashion-plate, Hosni Mubarak. Silvo also takes a risk with this look from back in 2002 - a Pirates of the Mediterranean meets the Real Slim Shady - and I appreciate l’uomo alla moda with a blatant disregard for rules. Che bello! 

Feb 14

Hugo Chavez would not normally make it on my “best dressed list” - His propensity for collared shirts with a clashing tee underneath just makes him look more like a wrestling coach than he usually does — but then I saw this! Congratulations Hugo! By accessorizing your signature outfit with a charcoal Members Only jacket - you have a look that is both populist and popular!

Hugo Chavez would not normally make it on my “best dressed list” - His propensity for collared shirts with a clashing tee underneath just makes him look more like a wrestling coach than he usually does — but then I saw this! Congratulations Hugo! By accessorizing your signature outfit with a charcoal Members Only jacket - you have a look that is both populist and popular!

Feb 11

Breaking Fashion News! Can’t Take A Hint Hosni is on a boat in the Red Sea after departing from Sharm el Chic. Rumor is he’s resigning after these photos circulated, ruining his political career - but jumpstarting his stud status. He may not be working, but he is working out! The newest Jetsetter is in good company and may be resettling in an exotic location - I am looking forward to seeing more casual wear in his retirement, like this ivory sweatsuit. Congratulations Egypt! Next up: Military Modern.

Breaking Fashion News! Can’t Take A Hint Hosni is on a boat in the Red Sea after departing from Sharm el Chic. Rumor is he’s resigning after these photos circulated, ruining his political career - but jumpstarting his stud status. He may not be working, but he is working out! The newest Jetsetter is in good company and may be resettling in an exotic location - I am looking forward to seeing more casual wear in his retirement, like this ivory sweatsuit. Congratulations Egypt! Next up: Military Modern.

Feb 10

Damn. No wonder the CIA put you in power - power accessories that is. No one blurs the line of modern and vintage like Augusto Pinochet. I’ve been known to mix pinks with purples - but to pair a paramilitary outfit with a bawler Rolex and polarized sunglasses before color photos were even invented? Thats what I call coup d’style for El Tata and the Chicago Boys.

Damn. No wonder the CIA put you in power - power accessories that is. No one blurs the line of modern and vintage like Augusto Pinochet. I’ve been known to mix pinks with purples - but to pair a paramilitary outfit with a bawler Rolex and polarized sunglasses before color photos were even invented? Thats what I call coup d’style for El Tata and the Chicago Boys.

Zine Al Abidine Ben Ali’s summer chic would fit in in his new home of Saudi Arabia or in the tango dance halls of Buenos Aires (see the upcoming post on vintage Dapper Dictators). Ben Ali is pure dapper: White linen dinner jacket, crisp shirt, crimson silk tie and matching kerchief square. His wife,  Leila Trabelsi - a fashion plate in her own right - reportedly stole 1.5 tons of gold on her way out of Tunisia - I can’t wait to see her new jewelry line. 

Zine Al Abidine Ben Ali’s summer chic would fit in in his new home of Saudi Arabia or in the tango dance halls of Buenos Aires (see the upcoming post on vintage Dapper Dictators). Ben Ali is pure dapper: White linen dinner jacket, crisp shirt, crimson silk tie and matching kerchief square. His wife, Leila Trabelsi - a fashion plate in her own right - reportedly stole 1.5 tons of gold on her way out of Tunisia - I can’t wait to see her new jewelry line.